My catholic family services therapist expressed to me that I should share with my priest the nature of my illness and that then all that love me would be able to assist me knowing that I was ill. Expect the church has known I have been ill for over two years.. just not with what.. besides the masses in my lung and attached to my spinal cord, the protein wasting the fat moving around like I am the elephant man, the inability to get to mass so I request somebody to come see me on Fridays but low, nobody comes.. and now there is an update in the parish family directory and we were left out.. guess it is not unconditional Christ loves everyone is someone. just the ones that dont’ bleed on the carpet. So I don’t belong here. Now what? I spent the better part of two years trying to figure out where I would belong and all I feel is dead. Just want to be with my family.. to do stuff that I could do with them maybe find a farm or something that I could do something.. but all I feel is dead.. thank you to a christ center community of compassion.. silly me thinking I belonged, was important or even a talent.. but no just dead.. wonder if that is how Christ felt..